Archive for June, 2008

this could be the summer when i grow up

Trust no one.


pachuca sunrise

A song by Minus the Bear that I would love to share with you but can’t at the moment.

I’m computer fixing… It’s a painful and arduous process. Fuck technology.

As well, fuck wordpress never posting the long ass post I wrote the other day about the events of the past three week or so. FUCK YOU. Mmm… jokes….

some kind of wonderful?

I really hate everyone at this moment in time. No lie, I have no stronger desire than to go get smashed [makes you wonder why I didn’t take Wes up on that offer to hang out with him and Nate and Teddey…]. Seriously though? It’s why I spent hours tonight sitting outside. And right now I’d love to sleep but I’m not tired. I’d love to be constructive but I’m frustrated. I’d love to just take off… Do something… ANYTHING.

Sometimes I make bad choices. Today was one of them.

I should stick to my pansy ass ways of hiding behind walls. Decidedly, I prefer it when people DON’T know the truth.

broken computers

Like how all of mine are and how much that sucks. Broken like the friendships and relationships I used to have with people. Broken like a bone after severe impact. Broken having an effect like broken strings to a musician.

But I digress, because I am both an artist AND a musician and a friend and my strings, brushes, voice and mind are intact and well.

I feel like I have a lot to say, and to document, but like I’ve been writing in a journal forrealsies in place of blogging. And you know what? I can be more honest that way.

I’m not as honest or apathetic as I pretend to be and I don’t care. The people who saw that by now matter a lot. There are only a handful of those people. There are two I can think of off hand.

Oh God I don’t know… I got about halfways to drunk last night and had a good time. I woke up late today and would’ve had a bad day but there’s this kid and even when I have bad ways he seems to find ways to turn them around. I feel all stupid being like “zomg he’s sweet and he cares about me” and girly, but it’s true and I feel like I can say that because the only person who will read this is Lauren, who knows EXACTLY what I mean.

Speaking of which, Lauren is just about the sweetest most fantastic girl on the face of the planet. She’s mature and she understands shit. She listens to me bitch and I listen to her and she helps me feel better and sort my shit out and APPARENTLY I help her too. =) Not to mention that we don’t have to lie about anything and I love it.

Oh let’s face it… Basically Lauren, Connor, and Justin have been my amazing saviors lately. Which isn’t to exclude Tabitha and Jake either who I also love.

I don’t even know… Time to go work on computers.